We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
