"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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