Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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