There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
