There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
