how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Randomize
