so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize