It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
Randomize
