I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
