I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
