Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
