Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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