i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
