im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
