D3 body, D1 cock
Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
My cat gives me a boner
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
