all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
Randomize
