You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
there is puke in my bra ... again
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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