so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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