Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
