how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
you had me at cake vodka
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
