I want to stick my p in your. b.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Randomize
