Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
