Swine flu. Run for my life!
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
