My friends, they love my intelligence
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
