Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I checked into jail on foursquare
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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