Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Randomize
