So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
