i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
