Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
you have to choose: penises or morals?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
