You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
