when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
