HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
We had sex on a dog bed..
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
