He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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