Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
me + whiskey = a bad person
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
