Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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