what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
