I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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