Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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