I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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