Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize