Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
