I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
