Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Randomize
