Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Randomize
