I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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