PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
There r osticjed everywhere
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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