ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
