apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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