I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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