yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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