He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize