it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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